Raucus caucus

1/04/2008 11:31:00 am / The truth was spoken by Rich /

Oh what fun! So the Iowa caucuses then. Anyone care? No. But I think the results represent further evidence that America has lost it's way. A good idea gone bad. The two Republican candidates most successful yesterday were a Southern Baptist who believes in Biblical inerrancy and a Mormon. Mike Huckerbee takes the Bible literally, he considers it scientifically and historically correct. Mitt Romney is a fucking Mormon who believes Jesus came from outer space!

Of course one ought not to expect anything more from a US politician. The recent spate of senators caught performing oral sex on truck drivers and under cover police officers is evidence of this.

My favourite example of political hypocrisy was Strom Thormands' fathering of a black daughter. Good old Strom who been in the Senate for about 200 years, was a segregationist and probably a card holding member of the Ku Klux Klan or the Kuklos as it was probably called when he first joined up. Strom giving his black house maid six of the best sometime in the 50's remains for me the clearest symptom of America's inevitable slide into lunacy.

Other clear signs were there. The assassination of Martin Luther the King Jnr for example. Chris Rock said he was a man who stood for peaceful protest, but Martin Luther King today is a street and no matter which city you're in, MLJ Boulevard is always the most violent.

Christopher Reeves was another clue. The irony of all ironies. Superman breaks his neck and becomes a cripple. Christopher Reeves' accident was a metaphor. It was a clear sign from the Gods that America was going bandy. The man who made us all believe man could fly suddenly couldn't even walk.

Of course the craziest of all crazy things would be if the nation went ahead and voted in a black President. The craziest choice, but young Barack Obama might be the one and only dude that can make the country sane again.

Good luck to him. There are 2 million dudes in America who weigh more than 40 stone. Shifting public opinion is one thing, shifting all those fat arses into a polling station is sommat else.

Amen.

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