Voy Por Ustedes

I've been a little under the weather recently, but the mild jungle fever I picked up probably from queuing in the Spar shop with squaddies seems to have passed and my constipation has eased up a little. I was digging it out with a stick at one point, but it's oozing out of it's own accord now, sort of slowly, like traffic filtering it's way onto the M6 from the junction with the M5.

Anyway, so it's off to Luton tomorrow for the European APAT poker event. I'm slacking behind the other two mob members as far as medals go in the APAT series of tournaments, but through my will and blind luck I plan to set things right again.

A field of 300 of the ugliest people you ever saw sweating away in a poker room for twelve hours a day over the course of the bank holiday weekend shall have to be overcome, assuming the stench doesn't overcome me first and sometime late on Monday evening I hope to be holding aloft a nice little cup and gold medal and some monies for spending purposes and a seat in the GUKPT Grand final at which I shall win financial security allowing me to live the rest of my life Hugh Hefner "style" in silk pyjamas on a diet of pink gin and melted cheese and lobster hors d'oeuvres.

As a contingency plan, should the cards abandon me, I plan to live in abject poverty, living off pot noodles and Panda shandy.